Spa days, bubble baths, shopping sprees…

Reader, if those are the first things that come to mind when you think of self-care, you’re not alone… but you’re totally off track.

And so was I.

I used to never make time for self-care… because I believed that it required a significant amount of my precious time, time that I didn’t have. What an irony.

Oh and I also used to believe that putting myself first was selfish.

I cannot count how many times I’ve said yes or agreed to do things I didn’t want to just to please other people. Believing that it was my duty to put other people’s needs before my own. Like I was the one responsible for their own happiness. This. is. total. BS.

Reader, if you relate to any of this, please listen up.

First things first, it’s not anyone’s responsibility but their own to be accountable for their happiness.

Second, you can’t control other people’s feelings.

And third, (probably the most important of all), you can’t pour from an empty cup.

This means that if you want to help people the best you can, you need to BE at your best.

You need to fill your own cup first.

Think about it; if you can’t take care of yourself, how can you believe you can take care of others?

If you really want to be available for others, you need to be available for yourself first. Emotionally, particularly. We can always push the body a little bit more, but there’s only so much we can take mentally and emotionally.

I learned this the hard way…

But that forced me to change all my beliefs (for the better) about self-care.

I went from believing that self-care was a sporadic practise you need a lot of time for, to understanding that self-care is a HABIT; a habit that can be learned, practised and perfected.

And that no, self-care is not selfish.

Real self-care comes down to taking the smallest, but most significant actions to put yourself first, DAILY.

And here are what I believe to be the pillars of self-care to practise consistently:

• self-love and self-compassion
• setting boundaries with yourself and other
• getting in touch with your emotions and intuition
• being accountable for your dreams
• nurturing meaningful connections and relationships
• exercising and eating clean

I know it looks overwhelming. But it’s really not. It all comes down to this one thing.

Once you master that, the rest is just about taking aligned action and having the courage to do what’s best for you.

Tomorrow, I’ll tell you about my favorite personal growth tool (the one I believe everyone should make time for).

In the meantime, would you share with me what pillars of self-care are you trying to improve?

Just hit reply to this email to let me know.

Take care of yourself,

Marie
A Mindset of Courage

P.S. The subject line of tomorrow’s email is [here’s what you can expect next]